Pregnancy, Yoga and a lesson of Surrender
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Over the past few months I've been quietly incubating a tiny little (constantly growing!) seed that has had the biggest impact on the way I feel in my body and my mind than anything else in my life... and this is only the beginning!
When it comes to keeping active I'm not one to take it gently. From surfing throughout the winter months to running down volcanoes in the sweltering sun, it's fair to say I enjoy challenging my body. My regular yoga practice has for some years been Ashtanga, or at least my own form of Ashtanga that perhaps doesn't follow all the rules. But when I found out I was pregnant suddenly all of this changed. They say that you should 'carry on your daily life as normal' but it's not so easy to run with sore breasts or to practice fast paced Ashtanga Vinyasa when you feel seasick!
Listening to and actually hearing your body is something that comes with practice, and yoga is one of the best methods I've found to cultivate this awareness. When in a posture, it is part of the practice to feel where your body is in space, to notice if it can move a little deeper or needs to ease off. Being aware of where your mind is throughout this, using your breath as an anchor to draw it back to the present, is your practice.
As my body has started to change I've had to listen to it. Despite wanting to go for a 10km run (I know, this sounds like madness to some) I've opted for a walk uphill. My yoga practice has slowed down and I've naturally started to omit poses that make me feel uncomfortable, most of which are contraindicated in pregnancy anyway. Having to surrender to the way your body feels isn't always easy, especially if you enjoy challenging it, but sometimes it's necessary.
Above all of this, my biggest hurdle to overcome was the concept of letting go of my freedom. I never expected to feel sadness about something that made me so happy, but somehow I found myself overwhelmed with tears as I thought about the amazing, free, exploring and adventure filled past 10 years that were drawing to a close. Again, another lesson in surrender. To expect everything in life to stay the same forever is unrealistic, and so any change is something to embrace. As the next chapter opens it seems that the only thing to do is to release into it. I have a feeling motherhood is going to be one long journey into surrender! đ
I was hoping to run a pre-natal yoga class but finding the time seems hard! So instead I will be running a series of Mums 'n Bumps workshops over the coming months for those of you sharing this journey with me. I'm looking forward to it! Get in touch if you'd like more info.